The Vampire Diaries – Every End Has A Start von Asu91 ================================================================================ Kapitel 51: If You Only Knew ---------------------------- Ich bin zurück!!! Mit einem neuen Teaser-Kapitel! Nach dieser schockierenden Episode musste ich einfach weiterschreiben, um mich abzulenken. Es war so traurig ;__; Aber nun lasst uns einen Cut zu meiner kleinen FF machen. Es geht mit einem kleinen Teaser-Kapitel und einem Tagebucheintrag von Elena weiter. Die Ferien liegen sechs Wochen zurück. Der Tagebucheintrag wird euch etwas über Elenas Gefühle erzählen. Viel Spaß! _________________________________________________________________________________ If you only knew How many times I counted All the words that went wrong If you only knew How I refuse to let you go Even though you're gone It's 4:03 and I can't sleep Without you next to me I toss and turn like the sea If I drown tonight Bring me back to life Breathe your breath in me The only thing that I still believe in is you If you only knew Dear Diary, it's been six weeks and nothing's changed. I wake up every day and I feel terrible. I can hardly breathe and I feel the urge to cry but the tears won't come. There are none left. This sadness is killing me, literally. It's like I was thrown right back to that point when my parents died. I'm that sad, helpless girl again. I can't fight it. These feelings hurt so much. They're crushing me, strangling me, holding me in place, keeping me alive enough to torture me. Even hell couldn't be worse. They even put me on those stupid pills again but those aren't working, either. They don't have the promised effect. I still feel that heavy weight upon my heart and no matter how many pills I take it doesn't become lighter and I don't get better. I'm trapped in this depression. Jenna and Alaric still don't know about my condition. Jeremy and Anna kept their promise not to tell them. I know they're worried about me, especially Jeremy because he has seen me go through this before but it wasn't so bad last time. Moving in with Bonnie didn't help, either. I hoped she would distract me a little from the pain but it doesn't work. It's not her fault. It's mine because I don't dare to open myself up to anything. I don't even know what happiness is anymore. I'm too scared to experience it only to get crushed again in the end. I can't take that risk. There's only so little of me left... I know I should be grieving for my boyfriend instead of holding on to something that was so wrong and doomed to fail since the beginning. But I can't. I can't let it go. I can't let him go. It's true. You never know what you've got until it's gone... _________________________________________________________________________________ Ich bin gemein, weil ich euch nichts Konkretes gebe, oder? Ich verspreche aber, dass sich bald alles aufklären wird und ihr erfahren werdet, warum Elena so deprimiert ist. Diejenigen die meine Trailer gesehen haben, werden schon eine Ahnung haben. Ich versuch mich mit dem Updaten zu beeilen, kann aber nichts versprechen. Ich bin jetzt in der 13 und es ist einfach die Hölle. Deshalb kann ich auch jetzt erst weiterschreiben. Einfach keine Zeit x.x Bis zum nächsten Mal eure Asu Hosted by Animexx e.V. (http://www.animexx.de)