Searching.
I.
“So, you’ve come for me again, Kaiba?”
There was more behind that simple observation, and Seto almost believed to hear astonishment in his tone. Then again, he was anything Seto wanted him to be, if it wasn’t for this one crucial flaw - he remained just a construct of Seto's own mind, an elaborate hallucination.
Seto had not come to duel, not after the disappointing results of their last one. But the puzzle was not yet complete, and this was all he had to ease his burning desire. There was not much else Seto could do to fill the void, however. Dueling against his creation had turned out to be a waste of time, but Seto’s mind had only so much to offer when it came to connecting to someone else.
What should he do, if not fight him, challenge him? Talk?
He did not want to talk. He had no words to convey the turmoil inside of him, and there was nothing that his own hallucination could possibly say to soothe it. It was Yugi who had approached him then, as always drawn to his uncertainty, and with an unnerving ease, he had reached up to cup his cheek, a strange smile on his lips.
Seto did not know what to make of it, even though he was the one controlling all that happened here, so he remained frozen in place as the other Yugi’s fingers ghosted over his jawline. The Solid Vision system was wired with Seto’s brain to emulate the sensations, like that of warm finger tips on his skin, in a way that would feel perfectly real, but even though Seto could feel it, there was something off. It was like an echo, unreal and distant.
He should have expected as much. There were the limits of his own imagination, even though it might seem like his creation acted on his own volition. Still, somehow, Seto was sure this should have done something to him, anything, but he felt nothing. Maybe this kind of contact was indeed overrated. He did not require any tenderness, and certainly nothing as childish as physical comfort. All he knew and all he needed was the heat of battle, nothing less.
“Kaiba”, Yugi said again, softer this time, and it made Seto's stomach churn. Then, suddenly, there was Yugi’s hand on Seto’s throat, his thumb pressing into Seto’s adam's apple and Seto swallowed under the pressure, unmoving, his eyes still meeting Yugi’s relentless gaze.
“Why are you doing this?”
It was then that Seto realized that there was pity in Yugi’s smile, and he knew what Yugi was about to say before the words came out. That broke the spell, and Seto instantly withdrew.
“Shut up!”, he yelled, his voice ringing in the large, empty room, and as he lashed out, his hand passed right through the dissolving hologram, his outburst effectively ending the simulation.
II.
Seto did barely sleep at all, his eyes fixed on the incomplete puzzle, his craving so strong he was sure that it had to be powerful enough to reach beyond the constraints of physical existence.
Still, he could not feel any familiar presence, neither inside the golden pieces of puzzle that were cool and unmoving beneath his fingers nor within the reaches of his mind.
That did not make him doubt, however, it only fuelled his desperate, stubborn resolve. He would find him, no matter what, and then, then— The memories of the thrill of battle, his racing heartbeat as his only worthy rival had pushed him to his limits, consumed his mind again, and all Seto knew for certain was that he would not be able to rest until he had what he wanted.
Victory.
A true fight with a worthy opponent.
To have their souls clash again in eternal battle.
He did not plan, did not even think, beyond that.
III.
“Kaiba”, Atem said - for Atem was who he was, blinding like a manifestation of shining light now elevated above all earthly ties of mortal flesh and desire. His name came to Seto almost naturally now, as if it would be preposterous to ever think of him as anything else. Atem's tone was firm, but there was a fondness in it Seto could never have emulated from memory alone.
Seto's mind was still clouded, reeling from the rush of ecstasy of their souls finally joined together again on this removed plane of existence. It even drowned out the fatigue that was pulling at him, tugging at his seams. His mere existence here was a battle determined by willpower, by strength of consciousness, and Seto would not lose it - he had never been more certain about anything.
Atem stepped closer to him, and before Seto knew it, he found himself clasping the hand Atem had offered him to help him get up from his knees. He could not get up just yet, but he could hold onto him, overwhelmed by the realness of his presence, in an attempt to steady and anchor himself right here, in this moment, in this place in space and time.
Atem's hands were warm on Seto’s skin as they brushed over his cheeks, his touch appreciating and sure, and there was not only gentleness, but certainty in the way he put his fingers under Seto’s chin to make him look up. Seto had all but forgotten to protest, strangely taken in by the other’s touch that seemed not out of place at all, just a self-evident conclusion to their duel. Still, when Atem bowed down to him, brushing his hair from his forehead to kiss it, Seto had expected it to be unnerving, upsetting even. What he had certainly not expected was that the softness of Atem’s lips and the warmth of his breath on his skin would be so intimate and --familiar.
It resonated within him, tugging right at the ache in his chest that had inevitably pulled him across dimensions to this one soul out of so many.
Seto closed his eyes, and it felt like plunging into darkness, so he forced them open again, clutching Atem’s wrists in fear of slipping away.
“You don’t have to fight, Kaiba”, Atem said, softly. “I will not force you to leave me. But I had to lay my arms down and move on - in the end, you will have to do that, too.”
While working on reassembling the puzzle, Seto had only ever thought about getting here, finding him, and had never considered what would come after. Yet Seto Kaiba would never go back when he could go on instead.
Atem was wrong, however. The pharaoh had not laid down his sword, but instead had risen to Seto’s challenge without hesitation, and Seto was certain neither of them would ever truly surrender. A calm came over Seto with this certainty, silencing all other aspirations and desires. For once, Seto felt no stirring anger, no desperate need, not even fear. With a sudden clarity, like this was a truth that he had known ever since their first battle, Seto saw it - their souls joined together, clashing and intertwining, before his own lifetime and beyond.
And this time, he would not let Atem leave without him.
